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Einstein and God

Posted Sunday October 1, 2006, 6:06 am, Over one day old
Quantum uncertainty never causes a lawnmower without gas to start.| | | | |For those of you who are worried that the no-free-will viewpoint could jeapordize the concept of personal |&|quot;responsibility|&|quot; and therefore cause society to crumble, don|'|t worry.

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Free Will Update

Posted Sunday October 1, 2006, 6:07 am, Over one day old


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A Test for Free Will

Posted Sunday October 1, 2006, 6:07 am, Over one day old
There can be no hint of sarcasm in your comment or it will void your test.| | | | |According to my view that free will does not exist, you will be unable to perform that test unless you actually happen to think the things I asked you to say or you think it would be funny to write them anyway.

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Women and Horses

Posted Sunday October 1, 2006, 6:07 am, Over one day old
|I have met quite a few horse lovers. To be fair, most men would eventually say no too, but a few would try it before going off to watch Jackass II on Imax.| | | | |So I am left wondering about this inexplicable attraction between women and horses.

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I Hate My Guts

Posted Sunday October 1, 2006, 6:07 am, Over one day old
|I was nose snorkeling late last night and had a strange thought, even by my standards.| | | | |Yes, I said nose snorkeling. You could just look right into the womb with your x-ray eyes and, in all likelihood, mutate the baby?s genetic code.

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Answer to the Philosophical Question of the Day

Posted Sunday October 1, 2006, 6:07 am, Over one day old
Each creature acted according to its nature and its programming, as all moist robots must.| | | | |We don?t need to know if the guy with the stick is irrational or not. That?s not his fault any more than it?s the lawnmower?s fault for running out of gas.| | | | |?Fault? is a perception.

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Toothpaste Smuggler

Posted Sunday October 1, 2006, 6:07 am, Over one day old
And half the time I arrive late at night when the gift shop is closed. | | | | |The nicer hotels offer free toothpaste if you?re willing to wait a few hours until they get around to delivering it. But if you have a busy schedule, that means going to your first meeting smelling like airline peanuts.

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Inconvenient Garbage

Posted Sunday October 1, 2006, 6:07 am, Over one day old
I?m happy to sign autographs in person, but I feel bad doing it because I?m turning a perfectly good piece of future garbage into something the person will have trouble discarding. | | | | |If I were more famous, perhaps people would frame my autograph and display it.

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Philosophical Question of the Day

Posted Sunday October 1, 2006, 6:07 am, Over one day old
Just like the bear, the irrational guy kills the guy who poked him.| | | | |Whose fault is it now? Now the guy with the sharp stick pokes him and gets killed.| | | | |Whose fault is it?| | |

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History

Posted Sunday October 1, 2006, 6:07 am, Over one day old
I don?t know if the Pope has annual performance reviews with God, but I don?t think he?s in for a big raise this year.| | | | |God:?Okay, let?s take a look at your accomplishments for the year. But I like to think that TWO billion would have died if I hadn?t reminded people that war is bad.

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